for 10 years –wake up, shower, quick breakfast, get in car, drive 1 hour –pay tolls and go through tunnels along the way –finally get to work. when you arrive at work, you say hello to 10 people, go into your office, work till lunch –with a few meetings in between –saying hello again–see people face to face –work in office after lunch –more meetings, more hellos–a bit of gossip at water tank. get back in car, drive 1 hour–see family, etc.
this is what we call the “rat race” –millions live in it their entire working lives.
stop –enter internet and this process can be changed and is changing –again for millions. now, more than ever, people are working from home. no more driving to work, paying tolls, saying hello, seeing people face to face. you now work on your own little work island from home. at first you think–“fantastic”–no more BS commute, no more tolls –saving money and time. this is all true and it is fantastic at first. but then you fall into the isolation phase –“hey, where is everyone?” –it is just you now and you sit in your home office for 8-10 hrs a day–on your own. you look outside your suburban window–only trees –no one is there except a few stay at home moms walking the dog. you go for a run in the hood at lunch –no one there. you yell out in frustration after a sales call–no one hears you. you are alone on your work island.
to make it on the island, you must come to a turning point in your mind –one that will allow you to say–“this is my life now –working from home –and guess what–it is not so bad–in fact, it is great –you see your family more, you save time, money” but you do need to proactively make the transition in your mind to be successful on the island –make habits out of your new routine –make a new life on your island.
i am on an island. technically, we are all on our own little islands –in our minds of course. we essentially live alone with our thoughts. we speak within our own minds–literally to ourselves. you ask yourself “should i buy this shirt or that shirt” –then you give yourself an answer. you say to yourself “should i call that person a name” –“no, better not” –once again –having a conversation with yourself. this obviously happens over and over every minute of every day of your life –thus you live with yourself on your own island. it will only be you by yourself when you live that last moment of life –telling yourself goodbye. we drift around bumping into other islands and living with those islands (people) –but when you are lying in bed next to the other island and you say goodnight, you then go back to your island to sleep. it is strange to think about life this way–i know–but if you think about it –it is quite true. ask yourself.
can you say those words to yourself about what other people think about you? probably not, right? why do we give a damn so much about what others think about us? why do we have to feel accepted in a group or in society as a whole? why do we have to present a BS image to the world because we care about what others think about us? we all must make the “not-caring” transition to evolve in our lives because at the end of the road, at the end of the line, at the end of your life –what will really matter? yes, it will matter how you are perceived after death –“was he a good person” yes, no, maybe –but this answer can be anything depending on who is being asked –and then do you really care what so and so thought about you –i mean you are dead! you should really only care about what your family thinks about you, right? or am i not right in this thinking? for those who do not even think these things –you are the lucky ones–you have evolved, you have less insecurities –you don’t care! congrats, you made it! but for the rest of us –we are insecure, we do give a shit for some reason or another –we yearn to live more peacefully in our own minds –we want to break from the endless and ongoing chains of peer pressure –cemented so many years ago by our first insecurities. how do we help our children from falling into this trap, from creating the first link on a relentless chain. first remedy for us –just say you don’t care when a thought comes up. first remedy for our kids –tell them not to care so much about what others think–to only care what your family thinks about you. this connection between the individual psyche and society as a whole is at the foundation of civilization –we can’t help it –we can only look away from it as much as humanly possible. so look away and say “i don’t care”
i know these realizations come to all who grow older and allow themselves to acknowledge them –but it is fun to actually go through the process of coming upon these realizations after events trigger the “aha” moment. in this case, i suddenly realized that from the beginning of life, we have a set way of acting and going about life –and that this way of acting in society always remains essentially the same until the end. one example is the groups we move in throughout life–we always seem to move in the same types of groups time after time. in the early days, if you moved from school to school, you would find yourself being part of the same type of group from one school to the next–it just seems to happen that way. this also seems to happen as you get older and move from community to community –you again seem to gravitate to the same type of people as you have always been associated with. not sure if that is a good thing or not–always being among the same types of folks through your life. sure–you mingle with different types that are not part of your defined core demographic –but in the end, you look next to you and essentially see yourself looking back. which i suppose is normal –you want to hang out with like-minded folks. but–are you and your group a good group to be with? that question is irrelevant because we seem to remain the same and never really change. agree?