jackasses are everywhere you look – in fact you can look in the mirror as well – because we are all a pain in the ass once in awhile. but there are those folks that like to push your buttons and make you react. they want to see you go out of character and fly off the handle – especially in front of groups. they are the instigators that deliberately think about what to say to get you going. the first few times, you will fall for it – defending your pride or honor – they know how to get you upset. you must recognize these jackasses and you must not react. you must hold your tongue, you must not react, you must keep a calm, happy face, you must fake your feelings towards these people – don’t let them know that your non-reaction is a reaction. you must not react and then fake a nice reaction. they do not need to know what you are really thinking. this is hard to do if you are a person who shows their emotions all the time – and are known for showing emotions. you must gradually change your reactions. you must have controlled reactions most of the time and save loose reactions for more intimate friends. you can do this but you must work at it – you must deliberately put yourself above it all and be more mature in these public situations. next time – stop, think, don’t react.